I keep blowing my boss every time he makes me feel dumb [26F]

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I have all the time been extremely confident in my intelligence. I went to U Toronto after I moved to Ontario. I’ve all the time had good jobs. But for the last couple years, I’ve had a male boss who all the time insults my intelligence when I screw up. And it all the time ends up with ditzy blonde jokes. And it all the time ends up with me sucking his dick because I cannot get enough of it.

I get off on pain and intelligence degradation…those are my big two probably. And every single time a man in authority shows me I made a mistake and did something wrong, then implies I’m dumb, I feel a need to worship that man. It’s stupid and absurd and ridiculous but I feel it, but most men are honestly too good to take benefit. My boss isn’t, and he’s the one who has created me into the slut I am today.

I once left a slide out of a presentation, and I swallowed his dick in his car.

I once forgot a customer information disc at a sister branch and I ended up swallowing him in his office.

I nearly messed up a client meeting and I sucked him off at his house.

It’s just dawning on me how many times I’ve blown him, how much I wondered that was no big deal, how ditzy I am…all of it.

I’m not sure how to organize my thoughts. What are your questions?

NSFW: yes

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