I never liked camping at the lake.

Every Summer my in laws all looked forward to pulling their RV’s out the lake in the middle of nowhere. It was grossly hot outside and the water looked disgusting. Who would enjoy this? I stayed on the beach, covered in shade and enjoyed the afternoons scrolling through my phone.

You could use the toilets in the RV, but if you were far enough out you really only had two options when it came to doing your business. You could go squat in the woods, and risk a bug biting you or worse. Or you could go use the old state funded outhouses.

We had taken a boat out to the opposite side of the lake from where our vehicles and the RV were parked, and sure enough I felt my stomach telling me it was time to go. I saw the outhouse sitting far up on a hill and began walking.

I could smell it before I even got to the door. When I walked in the buzz of insects was all around me. I approached the stainless steel seat and looked down. A good 15 feet or so below was a pool of waste. Sitting down I tried to not think about it all. I pulled out my phone and started scrolling. The screens glow lit up the darkly lit room I sat in.

After I finished my business I began to reach for toilet paper, while still staring at my phone. Suddenly I felt something buzzing in my ear, some kind of bug flew in it. I freaked out a little, and in panic dropped my phone. It fell down into the hold below the stainless steel toilet. I could see it’s glow down there, it hadn’t landed entirely in the pool of waste but had got caught halfway down.

I felt as if I could almost reach it. The thought of sticking my hand into the hole petrified me, but so did the thought of leaving my precious phone in this horrid place and spending the rest of the weekend without it.

I lifted the seat up and stuck my arm down as far as I could reach. It wasn’t enough. At this point I was already committed, so I leaned over and crawled down into the hole, figuring my body was to big to actually fall into it. Sure enough, my phone was in reach. I wiggled my fingers trying to nudge it closer. I had it my hand now, but suddenly my weight shifted and I began to slip and my body fell through the hole. I went head first down into a deep pool of dark brown waste. The waste filled my mouth and nostrils, and even my eyes before I found my way up to the surface.

I screamed for help, but nobody came. I attempted to climb up, but only slipped back down. I could see the small light of the room above me but nothing else but darkness. I nearly puked from it all. An hour later nobody else had entered the outhouse. I figured at some point someone would come, but for hours it was empty.

The first night was the longest and hardest. I nearly ripped my nails off trying to climb out. My phone isn’t working either, it died pretty quickly after falling into the waste. I hope tomorrow someone needs to use the outhouse…