Let me start by saying that I am not a cuck. I didn’t let some random dude fuck and impregnate my wife. We have always been in a HAPPY and MONOGAMOUS relationship. HAPPY AND MONOGAMOUS!

It started when we decided to have a kid.

We tried for a year, but no dice. I suggested that we see our respective doctors, and, low and fucking behold, my platoon was severely wounded during a skateboarding accident I had when I was a teen.

‘Trish’ and I were devastated, but we decided not to give up and went the route of adoption. The agency matched us up with an expectant teen early in her pregnancy. Let’s call her ‘Stacy.’

Things were going well until we were shopping in a Buy Buy Baby, and this meathead bumped into ‘Stacy’ and kept walking. I yelled out to him, and he said, “pardon me.” A few moments later, ‘Stacy’ burst into flames, and she didn’t survive.

Can you believe that shit? Spontaneous human combustion. I’ve heard that it could happen, but never in a million years did I expect to see it first-hand. It was some scary shit.

And while I’m not trying to dismiss the tragic death of ‘Stacy’ and her baby, it hit ‘Trish’ pretty fucking hard.

However, ‘Trish’ is headstrong and wanted to explore other avenues, so we settled on IVF with donor sperm.

It was a success, and we were happy. We started turning the spare bedroom into a nursery, read all the ‘What to Expect’ books, created a registry, and made other general preparations.

Our doorbell rang at the start of ‘Trish’s’ third trimester. It was the same douche that bumped into ‘Stacy.’ He was holding flowers in one hand, a manilla envelope in the other, and a box that said Bugaboo Donkey at his side; the same Bugaboo Donkey that was on our registry.

I don’t know what came over me, but I punched him in the face, and let me tell you, it was the worst pain I ever felt. His chin felt like it was solid rock and was hot. Had I not pulled my fist away, I would have most certainly suffered third-degree burns.

He laughed, shoved me to the side, and walked into my house. Of course, I wasn’t having any of that, and I went to attack him from behind, but somehow how knew I was coming and knocked me on my ass.

He placed the flowers and envelope on our coffee table, looked at me, and said, “I’ll be back when the baby is born.”

He left without saying anything else.

I opened the envelope, and it was the form from the sperm bank. One of them had his picture on it. It said that he was the sperm donor.

I thought that shit was supposed to be confidential. I don’t know how he found us.

What the hell am I supposed to do?