But now she isn’t moving and she mostly looks like my mother again and I’m starting to get scared. I’m really scared and I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I could call 911 but maybe she’s a praying mantis. I could call the police but maybe I pushed my mother down the stairs. Oh, god, oh no, I pushed my mother down the stairs.

I remember taking my pills but just because I remember things doesn’t mean they happened. Or that they haven’t happened yet. Sometimes it’s both but I don’t think it is this time. Is she still moving? Maybe she’s twitching I am gonna be sick if that’s I think that’s an antenna.

That’s an antenna. It’s not a shadow. She IS a mantis it’s a shadow it’s a shadow it’s a shadow. Did I take my pills?

I hope I didn’t take my pills. I hope that’s not an antenna. They said my father had a heart attack but I saw her eating his face and I’m mostly sure I remember that. I know that might not mean it happened but I think it happened, I really think I watched her eat his face and put her face back on and is she gurgling?

She’s hissing at me. No, she’s got a punctured lung, maybe. She’s trying to breathe. She’s trying to breathe and I should call 911 because she’s hissing at me and she wants me to come downstairs where she can reach me with those forelegs. Those are forelegs behind her hands. Did she break both of her hands? Did I take my pills today? I took them yesterday. Is this yesterday?

I should turn on the light. I should take my pills. I should call 911 or the police or take the rest of my pills or turn on the light.

Is she gurgling or…chittering?

Oh, god, I pushed my praying mantis down the stairs and now she’s not my mother any more.

I think I’m going to turn on the light. Yes. Yes. I should say goodnight to my mantis. I’m gonna turn on this light and then I’m going to take the rest of my pills. I think that happened already. It should’ve happened before, I think.

I’m going to call the police, turn on the light and take the rest of my pills. With my mother. Yes. Okay.

Yes.