I had just finished my set in a dank club basement when the terror set in. Gun shots rang through this crowded club basement. People crushed each other on the way to the exit and I stood on stage for a moment mortified by the sounds of insane people breaking each others bones for a chance at life. The gnashing and crunching burned into my eardrums with the screams.

Once I left my trance I ran behind the stage to the green room and locked myself inside. There was only one exit and the shooter had to have known that. My best bet was to hope he runs out of rounds shooting the crowd and, after a while it sounded like I was right. Silence set in and it felt like I could finally exhale. I didn’t think to leave the safety of my locked room until a cop broke it down so I rested in there praying to hear sirens, but a worse sound plagued my conscience.

About 2 minutes after the shooting stopped I heard the silence get broken by something. It started quietly but quickly grew thunderous in moments. The phones of the victims were ringing. The sounds that I had grown so familiar to took on a suffocating tone. My eyes swelled and my stomach churned. The weight of the moment had not hit until I heard the sounds of loved ones praying for the dead. All adrenaline wore off and I wept for what felt like hours.

When the cops did arrive they escorted me out of the building but I had to walk through the valley of phones. Lock screens of smiling couples and happy families crunched beneath my feet. Phone calls from wives, husbands, sons, daughters shook the floor as I made it to the stairway out. Blood stains riddled the stairway and when I finally stepped into the brisk night air I saw the hollow faces of the lucky few who broke their bones, bodies, and minds to survive.

Don’t wait for a tragedy or wellness check to call your loved ones. Do it often and out of the blue. Call each other even if you don’t feel like it because its better to hear their voice one last time.