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When I was in school there was a bar down the street from my house that I would frequent to grab a drink and play pool after work. It was within walking distance so it was my spot, there was nothing special about this place and despite being in a school town there were rarely women here except on game nights.

This was a D1 college and people went wild during football season. This particular night our team hosted and was beaten by a rival team and that all the time drove people to the bar. I got off a shitty shift at work, walked to my spot and wanted nothing but a beer in my hand, but was immediately approached by a short but very attractive 20ish year old woman eye fucking me and asking “are you ready to get out of here?”

First of all, no I wasn’t ready. I was dead sober and worn out from work and I wanted a beer. Second of all, yes I was ready because I’ve all the time needed to work for pussy. I’m a fit and relatively attractive guy, but never in my life and never again since have I been handed a golden ticket to the vulva gates as I was on this evening, so naturally I responded “Yeah, let’s go.”

I walked there from my house so we got into her Mini Cooper that I barely fit into at 75 inches tall and she drove me to her apartment on the “I have money” side of town. We step inside and she turns on the light and I’ll be damned if I wasn’t in the Barbie aisle of a Toys R Us.

Pink everything, fuzzy bullshit, stuffed animals, dolls… it looked like Lisa Frank ejaculated all over this room. I’m actively ignoring red flags at this point though because an attractive girl gave me an immediate invitation to leave the bar and climb into a clown car I couldn’t fit into so she could ride my dick in Candyland.

Out pops a noisy Chihuahua because this was only a few years after Paris Hilton was relevant, and every woman her age conned their parents into believing this breed of dog was worth investing in. She quiets the dog down while I’m looking at the at-a-girl bullshit she’s hung on her walls; Valedictorian in High College, pictures of herself and awards from numerous clubs, volunteer work, honors programs etc.

What the fuck am I doing in this chick’s apartment at 10pm smelling like the French fries I was just delivering to tables an hour earlier? Irrelevant because now she’s removing clothes and turning off lights, and I’m committed. I turned down my evening beer for this shit, I was gonna see it through.

We get in bed, which for the record was far too high off the ground. I’m tall as shit, this chick was maybe 4’10” and to my memory needed 30 minutes and an oxygen tank to scale the side of her mattress. Anyway, I digress, we’re in bed and she wants doggie with zero foreplay… Just get after it seems to be my only direction, so I’m doing just that.

A couple of thrusts in and I’m feeling like the goddamn man. Why wouldn’t I? This chick was so enthralled the moment I walked in the bar she whisked me away to her Barbie dungeon for a solid dicking down. Nothing can touch me in this moment, I’m a fucking legend, tonight has confirmed my long held suspicion that I’m a sex God and oh no…… oh no….. why is she crying?

I’m still balls deep, but this girl bent over and hanging from my dick is now sobbing. So I stop and ask what’s wrong, she disconnects from my suddenly deflated dick and ego and begins to tell me how she recently discovered her boyfriend of 6 years has been cheating on her. She went to the bar that night with the sole purpose of grabbing the first dick she saw and taking it home with her to get even.

It’s all over now, there’s no chance of climax. She’s tired and crying and wants to go to bed, and this is before Uber existed. I’m a broke school kid who can not afford a taxi, so I sleep out on the pink, fuzzy, Chihuahua hair covered loud mouth barking ass dog couch with my blue balls. Next day we take her dog for a walk in silence, she drives me back to my place and we never speak again.

Hope she’s doing well, 10/10 experience I’d do it all over again today without inhibition.

NSFW: yes

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