[ad_1]

This is my most shameful secret. Nobody in the world has even the slightest idea about any of this and I would feel utterly crushed and humiliated if anyone in my life found out, although the idea of sharing this anonymously turns me on.

I consider myself to be a straight man. I have never been sexually attracted to another man but there is something that I discover very arousing about an erect penis in isolation. I have enjoyed fantasizing about giving a blow job for as long as I can remember and I enjoy porn of genuinely feminine shemales with big cocks.

When I was in my mid-20s I started living on my own and had the opportunity to begin exploring these feelings for the first time. I started by ordering a slim 6′ lifelike suction cup dildo, a douche and plenty of lubricant. It was crucial to me that the dildo was as lifelike as feasible because I wanted to imagine that it was a real penis. As soon as they arrived I unpacked the dildo, got on my knees and started sucking it like I was really giving a blowjob. I then got completely naked, douched and lubed myself and took the dildo in my ass. I found that I could take the whole dildo very easily from the very begin and I was impressed by how good it felt inside me. I got into a routine of using it regularly and some days at work I found it hard to concentrate because I was so turned on by the wondered of getting home and taking the dildo in my ass. My favorite thing to do was to attach the dildo to the edge of my bathtub and begin by sucking and gagging in it and then take it in my ass and bounce up and down on it until my legs got tired. I would then lie on by back with my knees up to my chest and reach around to grab the base of the dildo and fuck myself as hard and fast as I could for as long as I could take it. My cock at all times stayed soft while the dildo was inside me but it still felt incredible and was a gigantic turn on, and after I was finished using the dildo on my ass I found that I got hard and was able to cum very quickly through typical masturbation and had probably the most intense orgasms I have ever had.

However, something that I did not anticipate was how feminine I felt when taking the dildo in my ass, especially when I was lying on my back. I started to imagine myself as a woman lying in that position and taking a real cock inside me. I wondered about one of the pretty shemales I saw in porn thrusting into me and me surrendering my body to them and allowing them to use by ass to make themselves cum inside me. These fantasies became a gigantic turn on for me so I decided to amplify them by buying a few items of lingerie including black lace negligees and panties and a selection of black stockings and hosiery, as well as a very thick 7′ lifelike ejaculating suction cup dildo.

I had worn lingerie before while masturbating but only very rarely so this was fairly new to me. I started out by making sure I had the whole evening to myself, douching myself and showering, and then getting dressed up in the lingerie. I put on one of the cute negligees, black panties and a pair of opaque black hold up stockings. Dressing myself up in lingerie made me feel so pretty and feminine and got me in the right mindset for taking by my new big dildo inside me. I had put both dildos in warm water while I was getting ready so they would feel more realistic while I was using them. I started by sucking the small dildo again and by this time I had trained myself to deepthroat it and so I gave my throat a pounding to begin with to deepen my feeling of submissiveness. I tried sucking the thicker dildo but found that I could hardly fit it into my mouth so gave up quickly. I then took off my panties and took the small dildo in my ass to get myself warmed up ready to take the big one. My heart was pounding as I guided the heavily lubed tip of the big dildo to my anus and I felt its gigantic girth pushing against my sphincter. It took some time for me to relax enough to take it inside me but to my surprise it only took me a few minutes to take the whole 7 inches of it into me and only a few minutes longer before I was bouncing up and down on it as hard as I had ever done with the small dildo. It gave me a new sensation. With the small dildo I could mainly only feel it at my ass hole whereas I could feel the large dildo much deeper inside me as well. It stretched my insides and made me feel full in a very satisfying way when it was all the way inside my ass. I started to masturbate while bouncing on the big dildo and as I was about to cum I tried using the ejaculation function of the dildo by filling the syringe with the fake semen that came with it – being inseminated by a cock was a big part of the feminization fantasies that I had developed. I was a little disappointed that I couldn’t feel the ejaculation happening inside me although the sensation of the dildo going in and out of me changed as there was suddenly a lot more liquid in my ass. After I had finished I enjoyed squatting over the toiled to let the fake cum drip out of me while I was still wearing stockings and a negligee now spattered with my cum – my asshole was sore and I felt used and humiliated as well as aroused and exhilarated.

I got into a routine of dressing up in lingerie and taking the big dildo in my ass a few times a week. Over time I trained myself to take the big dildo very hard for as long as feasible and my record was almost 20 minutes of continuous and very hard pounding before I had to stop.

I stopped using my lingerie and dildos eventually and never took my sissy fantasies any further although I still imagine what it might be like to take a real penis into my body and maybe some day I will figure out.

NSFW: yes

[ad_2]