A Swift Rebound
I’ve heard a few horror break up stories in my time, cheated on you with your brother, broken up hours before the wedding, shagged her own step dad etc, etc but I now have the story that beats all of them. My girlfriend broke up with me during a Taylor Swift concert. I still cannot quite believe it myself; I wondered I was being the best boyfriend ever getting my girlfriend tickets to one of Taylor’s shows. They were seats right at the front too which anyone who tries to buy Taylor tickets knows are like goldust. I really wondered I would be boyfriend of the year and be in line to get blowjobs for the rest of my life for getting my gigantic Taylor Swift fan girlfriend the best concert seats efficient. She was going with some of her girlfriends as while I think Taylor is super hot I’m not the biggest fan of pop music so I chose not to go. Honestly I would have loved to see Taylor in person but was worried about getting rock hard to her around my now ex girlfriend. In truth I should have seen the warning signs when she didn’t even try to drag me along to the show and instead seemed quite happy I was sitting this one out.
My worries started a few hours after she left and I was home alone lazily flicking through Twitter searching out Taylor’s name. I confess I was looking for live concert pics to jerk over as me and my girlfriend hadn’t had sex for the last few weeks which I guess was another warning sign I ignored. Scrolling down Twitter I found the message ‘OMG THIS GIRL JUST DUMPED HER BF LIVE ON STAGE AT TAYLOR’S SHOW’ Stupidly I laughed at first picturing the poor guy who took his girl to a Taylor show only to get dumped. Part of me thought if that guy fell into the trap I avoided accidentally getting hard for Taylor around his girlfriend. Refreshing my Twitter feed I see there is even more news about this on stage Taylor dumping and I can already see this is going to go viral. I work in the media, my connections helped me score the amazing Taylor tickets so I like to think I can tell when something online will become big news.
The more messages I read the more angry they are at the girl. Stuff like ‘SHE BROKE UP WITH HIM AFTER 3 YEARS WHAT A BITCH’ or ‘HE BOUGHT HER TAYLOR TICKETS AND SHE STILL DUMPED HIM WHAT A BITCH’ I still hadn’t put 2 and 2 together as I was still chuckling over the irony of a group of Taylor Swift fans supporting the man in a break up. One message I scroll down over has a video and I click on it. The picture quality was bad as it’s from a cell phone and it’s being filmed a long way from the stage. I can just about make out a shrill voice screaming something like I’m breaking up with you but the quality is so poor I couldn’t make her out. The first full on video of this will break Twitter and I debate texting my girlfriend and asking if she filmed it. It would be cool to help boost my girlfriend’s online user account and show her that my job can be useful as she has never really got why I work in online media.
The hashtag #TAYLORSWIFTDUMPING is now trending but I know that will change to something more catchy soon. Finally I discover a Tweet with a close up video and the caption simply reads poor guy with several crying face emojis. The video is from down the front of the show and I groan as the camera pans up to a close up shot of Taylor’s bare legs. My cock twitches as Taylor leans down further clearly trying to point out someone in the crowd. I’m tempted to pause the video so I can get my cock out over Taylor’s legs but withstand as I see a girl getting helped out of the crowd by security. My heart sinks as I see the dark red hair tied up into a ponytail with a white bow move past the camera. I try and calm myself down saying there is more than one girl in the world that does her hair like my girlfriend. I see her face and all doubt is lost, that is my girlfriend being pulled on stage about to dump me.
“So you had something you wanted to say to your boyfriend,” Taylor says into her microphone, smiling and letting my fangirl girlfriend hug her.
“Yes, Yes,” My girlfriend squeaks happily into Taylor’s mic, “Andy you bought me these amazing tickets for this show and it’s been a great 3 years but baby I can do way better, it should all be about ME so I’m done, it’s over, I’m breaking up with you.”
I sit there dumbfounded, squeezing hard on my phone staring blankly at the screen. All the cheering seems to stop on the video as everyone nearby gasps. Even Taylor looks in some shock losing her on stage presence and nearly dropping the microphone as my now smiling ex girlfriend gives her another hug. The video stops and I stare at the blank screen for a while till I feel a tear leaking out. This cannot happen, why would this happen? What did I do? Closing down Twitter I race for my girlfriend’s number and dial it praying this is all some sick joke.
No answer so I text her and text her, 15 minutes of none stop texting all saying the same thing. WHAT’S HAPPENING ANSWER ME PLEASE, I feel like my safe typical life is sliding quickly off a cliff. Everything has just fallen aside so suddenly as I keep texting my girlfriend’s number begging her to talk. Finally a message flashes up sent by one of her friends, leave her alone Andy she doesn’t want to talk. That message finally unlocks my emotion, switching me from numb sadness to outright rage. SHE DUMPED ME ON A FUCKING STAGE IN FRONT OF THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE I DESERVE A FUCKING CONVERSATION I text angryily. Her friend just sends back a shrugging emoji and I nearly toss my phone into the wall with blind rage.
Some Twitter notifications go off and I see the internet is on top form as it’s found my girlfriend and who she dumped. My feed is full of retweets of the video, Taylor Swift lyrics and just laughing emojis and finally I switch my phone off and bury my head in my hands. The tears flow as my life now feels over, I will forever be the guy dumped at the Taylor Swift show. I know how much those tags stay on a person and I almost laugh at the irony of me becoming a minor celeb. My job is retweeting and boosting viral news now I’m the news, my life has turned into a Black Mirror episode. I want to just fall on the floor and keep sobbing but my phone beeps for a text and I have to pick it up. My tears stop as I see a text from another of my girlfriend’s mates with a link to my ex girlfriend’s Instagram.
I click it and see it has been purged of all pics of me and the two of us together. That must have been how Twitter found me and when I see 100+ notifications on my Twitter icon I make a mental note to close my user account. There is just one picture on my ex’s Instagram user account now, a picture of her backstage with Taylor standing side to side with her, arm over Taylor’s shoulder. The caption reads’ Thank you to my idol Taylor Swift who taught me never to settle for less today is the begin of the new me. I really do throw my phone away in disgust this time hearing it clatter on the floor. Anger is burning through me now, blood vessels pounding my own heart beat into my ears. I want revenge, my bitch ex publicly dumped me and ruined my life. I have to get even. She suddenly dumped me, my rage filled brain thinks quickly so she won’t have had time to move all her stuff out. I nearly let out an evil laugh thinking my closet is full of her precious expensive clothes. My ex did have an addiction to shopping and buying new clothes and I cannot wait to burn them all.
I stride confidently into my bedroom ready to get vengeance on my ex when I open my wardrobe and see it’s empty. Never in my life have I felt more pathetic and stupid than I do right at this moment. She knew this was her plan all along. She’s probably been planning to dump me for weeks but hung around cause I got her great Taylor Swift tickets. I sink to my knees and punch the wall which does nothing but hurt my hand and my already damaged pride. Curling up on the floor I commit myself to staying here at least for the rest of the night and maybe the next few days. This is the worst break up ever and I wonder if I can ever recover from it when I hear a knock at the door. I ignore it, I really don’t want to see anyone, especially if it is one of my ex’s friends come to gloat. The door knocks again and I groan wanting just to be left alone in my misery and despair.
“Leave me alone,” I shout as someone loudly knocks on the door again.
The banging on the door doesn’t stop and out of frustration I have to get up. Part of me hopes it’s my mates with some beer and strippers to help me get over it. Another part of me hopes it’s my ex coming to pick something up so I can yell and scream at her like a proper break up. I open the door and see it’s neither. Instead my jaw drops as Taylor Swift is standing in front of me.
“Hi,” She says as I stand in my doorway dumbstruck.
I stare for an unnaturally long time trying to convince myself this is a trick. For all I know I could be dreaming but the more I stare at the tall blonde in front of me the more she looks back.
“Erm I’m sorry, I know this is a bad time and all but I er just wanted to see how you were doing,” Taylor says nervously.
My dumbed brain finally fires back into life but I’m still too distraught and emotional to answer properly.
“DID ERIN SEND YOU?” I shout making the world popular popstar jump in shock.
“Who? Oh right her no, no, no I came here on my own to apologize,” Taylor says quickly.
“OH YOU WANNA SAY SORRY HUH FOR GETTING ME DUMPED LIVE ON FUCKING STAGE?” I yell stepping forward making Taylor shrink back.
“YOU WANNA SAY FUCKING SORRY FOR LETTING MY EX RUIN 3 YEARS OF MY FUCKING LIFE AT YOUR FUCKING SHOW?” I vent letting all my rage out.
“YOU WANNA SAY SORRY FOR POSING WITH HER LIKE BEST FUCKING FRIENDS WHILE I’M AT HOME WITH MY HEART RIPPED IN TWO?” I scream so loud my voice starts breaking.
“STOP SHOUTING OR I WILL CALL THE POLICE,” One of my neighbors yells though the wall snapping me out of my rage.
“Sorry,” I say, massaging my aching throat before I look at Taylor.
She might be one of the most popular and gorgeous girls in the world but right now she is almost cowering in front of me with tears in her eyes.
“I’m sorry,” I mutter, “Please come in I won’t shout anymore I promise.”
I stand away from the door and Taylor Swift walks in my apartment. Closing the door I mentally slap myself, what the fuck am I doing? This is the enemy, without Taylor I might still have a girlfriend. The rage is building up again till I see the blonde slump onto my sofa and begin crying. For all my rage and hurt I cannot bare to see a girl crying so I calm myself and drop down into a nearby seat. I grab the bottle of beer that must have been left on the table for the past hour while my whole life fell aside. Taking a sip of the now warm beer I sit and wait for the tears to stop flowing.
“I deserved that, you deserve to be angry at I am so sorry for what happened to you,” Taylor spits out wiping her tear stained face on the sleeve of her long black coat.
“You have to believe me I had no idea she was going to do that. I would never want anyone dumped in that way,” She continues and I discover it odd that in the worst moment of my life I have a proper superstar sitting in front of me begging me for forgiveness.
“Her friends had this sign they were holding up right,” Taylor says, quickly launching into a full explanation.
“It said Erin wants to tell her boyfriend and I thought you would be there too and maybe it would be an on stage proposal or maybe a pregnancy thing I dunno I wasn’t thinking straight,” Taylor admits.
The wondered of marriage or having a baby with Erin has me sinking back into my chair. I certainly cannot blame Taylor, if I knew she was going to go on stage to tell me something I would have guessed the same.
“So when I got her on stage and it was clear you weren’t with her I got nervous,” Taylor says, barely pausing to take a breath.
“And when she said it and said you didn’t know my heart just broke it was just cruel she was cruel,” Taylor says finally pausing to check on my reaction.
Worried that the long silence will break me down into tears again, I decide to open my mouth and talk.
“I got her the tickets as a gift but was just happy for her to go, you know I had no idea about any of this,” I say numbly.
“She said so yeah,” Taylor sighs, slumping back into my sofa, “Anyone that comes on stage gets a backstage pass and I was too shocked to think about kicking her out.”
“Not your fault,” I reply, then stop and stare at her.
The blindside of the public and well planned breakup have clearly numbed my brain cells. Taylor Swift is sitting in my apartment, I am talking about my breakup with the queen of breakups. I was so busy being stunned by her sudden appearance that I’ve not even wondered to ask her the most obvious question.
“Why are you here?” I say looking directly at her.
Taylor sighs again, “Well first I wanted to say sorry about your ex and the breakup and tell you it wasn’t part of some grand plan.”
“She moved all her fucking stuff out of my place, it was a plan,” I snap back.
“That bitch,” Taylor says with a frown, “That’s so sick and mean.”
“You mean stupid fucking me for not spotting my girlfriend moving out on me,” I sigh in glum self reflection.
“No way I mean she planned it, she played off like everything is fine she knew she was gonna stab you in the back none of it is your fault Andy” Taylor says firmly.
My body twitches slightly with Taylor using my name. I want to ask her how she knows it but I’m pretty sure the answer will be because of my ex and I never want to hear her name ever again. Taylor sits forward in her seat again staring directly at me and looking a little nervous.
“I didn’t just come here to say sorry about your ex,” She says but I quickly interupt.
“She didn’t give out my address did she?” I ask looking round, scared my front door might get kicked down by a group of giggling Taylor Swift fans.
“No,” Taylor says, shaking her head,” I got one of my guys to look you up.”
“Should have just checked Twitter like everyone else,” I snap.
Taylor looks sympathetic as she looks around my flat then asks, “Which wall did you throw it into?”
“Throw what into?” I question.
“Your phone, when Twitter blows up at you it’s hard not to fling your phone away,” Taylor explains.
“I can’t remember why?” I ask still confused by this exchange.
“Number of phones I’ve thrown into walls and broken cause of a viral story,” Taylor admits and I sit up a little.
“Are you trying to be sorry for my breakup going viral?” I question the blonde.
“Yeah cause I know how much it sucks, how little control you have over the facts and well add that to a horrible breakup so I was worried about you,” Taylor says softly.
I laugh loudly, I cannot help it after the rollercoaster of the last few hours. Taylor Swift saying she cares about me is the final straw.
“This is all so fucking sureal,” I say getting to my feet.
“No it’s not your ex used me to try and hurt you as well as making herself famous off my name,” Taylor replies angrily.
“Oh did you come round to burn some of her clothes too,” I giggle at the absurdity of everything.
“The only thing of hers that I wanna get revenge on is you,” The blonde says getting up so we are face to face.
The laughter is replaced by nerves as I stand face to face with Taylor trying to work out what she means.
“You are gonna get revenge on her using me?” I say utterly confused as Taylor nods her head.
“How?” I ask then Taylor starts unbuttoning her coat.
I stand glued to the spot watching Taylor undoes her coat. This has to be a dream I repeat to myself over and over again till I gasp. Taylor slides her long black coat off her shoulders and lets it drop to the floor. She stands in front of me wearing nothing but a stunning set of black lingerie. I cannot react, I’m too shocked as I feel my jaw drop open and my eyes widen. Taylor seems comfortable with my reaction and stands there proudly letting my eyes take in her underwear clad body. The top half is a black lace corset just see through enough to show off her toned stomach muscles. Her tits are being pushed up by her bra giving her the sort of cleavage I wouldn’t have wondered efficient on a skinny girl like Taylor. My eyes trace down her body to the hanging stocking clips that have nothing to hang onto as Taylor’s legs are completely bare. Her black panties look tiny as I can barely see the waistband going around her hips. My cock which went rock hard the second Taylor undresses now throbs at the wondered of the pop star wearing a thong.
“Heels on or off?” Taylor asks calmly as I stand there like a stunned zombie.
“See I wondered about wearing stockings but I wasn’t sure if you were into them you know,” Taylor carries on talking while I continue to stand and stare.
“Hey earth to Andy come on baby I’m not that stunning,” She teases running my hand across my cheek.
“You are,” I somehow squeak out, making Taylor smile.
That big beaming smile makes me happy while her choice of lingerie has my bulge stretching into the front of my pants. Taylor Swift is standing in my apartment in her lingerie and if this is some out cold drunken dream then it’s the best one I’ve ever had.
“Heels off I think,” Taylor says calmly, kicking off her shoes and dropping a few inches in height.
“Why?” I ask still not thinking straight enough to form a complete sentence.
“Well my feet hurt a bit from being on stage and dancing oh wait you mean everything else right?” Taylor asks, pointing down at her lingerie clad body.
I nod happy I can answer without needing to open my mouth.
“Well,” The blonde says, stepping in close to me, “Like I said I wanted to make sure you were ok then I wanted revenge on your ex.”
I stare down at the stunning lingerie clad superstar and try to remember my ex’s name. Every time I try to picture her my eyes are drawn back to Taylor’s pushed up boobs or the big happy smile on her face. She is stunning even more stunning than I ever wondered efficient. I discover myself regretting not gonna her show because seeing this body on stage all sweaty entertaining thousands of people would be something special.
“Fuck you look hot,” I lamely say as my brain snaps into gear reminding me this is a moment millions of men and women would kill for.
Screw seeing her on stage in front of thousands, here she is one on one and wearing the sort of sexy lingerie you expect to see on a Victoria Secret runway model.
“I’m glad you like me, I was kinda worried that because you gave your girlfriend tickets to go alone you might not be a fan of mine,” Taylor says still happily grinning.
“I’m not the biggest fan of your music,” I admit surreally talking to Taylor Swift in her lingerie, “But I do erm like your looks.”
“You ever jacked off to me?” Taylor asks bluntly.
I reel back in shock for a few seconds then nod. No point lying when one of my masturbation fantasies is standing right there semi clothed in front of me.
“Awesome this will be better than I thought,” Taylor says, still grinning happily.
“What will be better?” I ask dumbly before Taylor steps forward and pushes me in the chest.
It’s a light shove but it still knocks me off my feet and drops me back down into my arm chair.
“The fuck?” I gasp before gasping as Taylor Swift drops to her knees in front of me.
This has to be a dream I repeat to myself over and over again. Taylor puts her hands on my shaking legs and eases them aside still with that big pure white smile plastered across her face.
“Taylor what are you doing?” I squeak out nervously and she laughs.
“Poor boy, did that mean old ex never give you a blowjob before?” Taylor asks and I forget to breathe.
I almost begin freaking out like when a drug fueled high suddenly gets too extreme and you want it to stop. That’s the only way I can describe how my brain reacted to Taylor Swift talking about a blowjob. It’s clearly not the first time a guy has freaked out in front of Taylor as she just stays patiently on her knees while my body calms down.