Something happened during my massage 30F

During the pandemic I tweaked my back and really needed a massage. I’d never gotten an at-home massage before but that seemed more appealing than driving out somewhere due to the pain. I found a website that did online bookings for basically any massage therapist that signed up with that service, and sorted by who had the soonest availability. No surprises that the highest rated services were booked out, but settled for a therapist that had a low number of reviews that were high.

After booking, the massage therapist called to say that he had forgotten to black out his availability but he had plans that evening, and could we reschedule? I was sort of annoyed and said I’d prefer to just get a refund. His tone changed to be a little more casual and said he could make it up to me by offering me tickets to a baseball game, but that refunds through the 3rd party service were really annoying to process. I wondered it was sort of overly casual and not super professional, but kinda just went with it. He said he had availability in the next few days. So I agreed to the reschedule.

The day of the new appointment he calls me to confirm, and go over a few things. He tells me that he doesn’t bring a portable table with him, that he prefers to do the massage using the client’s own bed, and was that okay. At this point I begin to wonder if that’s really a common practice, but I don’t want to be out a few hundred dollars, so I just say sure… but I begin to feel a little funny.

He arrives and he’s wearing a mask, can’t really get a good look at him, but he isn’t giving me any overt creep vibes. He seems very comfortable as he lays out some towels on my bed, and tells me to undress to my underwear and leaves the room. I ask if I should leave my bra on and he says it’s easier to massage if I take it off. I take it off and turn on Spotify so it’s not deathly and awkwardly quiet in there, and lay down.

He comes back in and says I can take off my mask if I want to, which also seemed sort of weird, but I do. And he gets to it. It starts off and it’s a ordinary massage. Other than it’s on my bed. We chit chat as he uses oils to rub my upper back and shoulders. I begin to relax as it feels good. Then he starts rubbing down my flanks. His hands begin dipping towards the side of my breasts, but not overtly so. At the same time I can feel where he’s straddled my legs, and put together he must be kneeling on the bed with his legs outside of mine. Is this really ordinary?

He switches it up and starts working on my thighs, using the towel to shield one side at a time. He asks about shifting my underwear to the side, and again I say okay because I have had massage therapists do this before.

But he’s working further up the leg than I’ve experienced before. His hand is circling my thigh as he rubs it inner to outer and it feels like his thumb is almost brushing my pussy. It feels sort of good because he knows what he’s doing but also inappropriate? And it starts to feel like it’s gone on way longer than an hour. I guess I’m tensed up so he asks me if I’m okay and I say yeah. He asks me to spread my legs another few inches. But at this point my heart is sort of beating. Like I’m pretty sure this is wrong, but I’m not sure how far he’s gonna take things. The touch is confusing. It feels really good but dangerously close to being very sexual, and I keep trying to tell myself I’m imagining the little brushes agains my pussy.

Then, I feel his thumb glide through my pussy under my underwear and I silently gasp. I can’t tell if it’s the massage oil but it feels wet-ish down there. I freeze and he slowly rubs and puts a finger in me. My heart is beating out of control and my mind goes blank. He breaks the silence and tells me in a firm, low voice to turn over.

I do. My mind is still blank. I don’t really want to acknowledge what’s happening so I keep my eyes closed and say “it’s too bright.” I feel him give me a towel for my eyes, and then feel his hands again on my inner thighs. He starts fingering me, there’s no way to ignore what’s really happening at this point. But he’s a professional, and he knows what he’s doing with his hands.

My scared animal brain is basically at war with itself. The intensity of the situation makes every nerve feel full of electricity. Every pump of his fingers feels like it’s straight to my deepest core. I feel all hot and it feels good which feels bad but I don’t know what to do other than lay there. Random thoughts flit around like should I stop this? Should I say something? Why can’t I say anything? SAY SOMETHING.

I don’t say anything. Nothing comes out but little gasping breaths as I think that if I cum from this, I can’t take it back. I’ll be dirty in this specific way forever. My body wants me to give in. My pussy is definitely wet, and I feel flushed. And so I give up. My mind goes blank as I accept the situation. My legs spread wider. He has two fingers in me as he grasps my hip. They’re pumping in and out super fast. His fingers hit my g spot hard, sending a shockwave of arousal through me. I stop fighting the pleasure and it starts to create and create until I finally moan “don’t stop,” becoming complicit. My body clenches as I cum hard, and he lets out a breathy moan, too, letting me know that he was getting off from this.

I feel his gaze on me as he rubs my tits. I stay with my eyes closed as shame rushes over me. He tries to get me off again but it wasn’t happening. I just really want him to leave, and i go inwards as he washes his hands and collects his things.

I felt dirty and used after for a bit, and he tried to text me saying he really enjoyed the session and offered me half off for future massages (lol) but I just told him no thank you. For awhile every time I recalled it I’d feel a wave of revulsion and sick to my stomach but also really turned on, like my stomach and my pussy were both clenching at the same time. I wasn’t attracted to him at all so it was very confusing and weird but now I both have never gotten another massage again, but have gotten off to massage scenarios. I never knew “happy endings” were offered(?) to women but I got sense that he had done this many times, and that maybe his clients were usually either older or more unattractive women based on him being turned on and wanting to come back again. I later looked at his actual website instead of just the 3rd party online scheduler and saw it said “only taking on female clients” in fine print, and it had like stock photography of men’s wet abs lmao. I think a few years out I’m able to have a sense of humor about it.

NSFW: yes