As long as I can remember, I’ve always sneezed twice in a row. It’s never a ‘one and done’ for me. Over time it has become a known quirk of mine. But I no longer find this ‘just a funny quirk’.

It all started the week after I turned 8. I was watching some cartoons, when I felt a sneeze coming. It came and went, and immediately I braced myself for the second sneeze. Do you know that split second you can open your eyes again before you sneeze a second time? That’s when it first appeared to me. A shadow, lurking in the corner of my eye. It startled me. But as soon as I opened my eyes again, there was no trace of a shadow. I ended up brushing it off as my imagination.

And how I wished it had been. Because the shadow kept appearing, and not only that. It kept coming closer.

When I turned 10, the shadow finally became something I could no longer ignore. I was on the couch when it happened. I felt a sneeze coming, and braced myself for the shadow I would see after. But that was not a shadow. Instead I saw a fully formed black figure in the kitchen.

As you can imagine, this led to panicked screaming and pleading cries to my mom. She rushed to my help, and consoled me while I sobbed uncontrollably. But of course she didn’t believe me. My insistence that I saw something ended up in a series of visits to a local psychiatrist. I was put on medication for schizophrenia.

When I heard that the medication would make it go away, I was so relieved. Until I had to sneeze again. Because there it was again, on the other side of the house. That day I made a decision. I would no longer tell anyone about it. And I would simply close my eyes when I felt I needed to sneeze. If I couldn’t see that would fix everything right?

Oh was I wrong. Because I couldn’t. When I tried, my eyes experienced a burning sensation I cannot describe differently as acid being dripped into you eyes. So I accepted it. I let it happen, I even kind of made it into a game. “Spot the figure”. God was I desensitised.

Until I was 11. Because the shadow had moved closer. It now was a few centimetres closer than it used to be. First I brushed it off, but… It has been coming closer with every sneeze.

At 13, I can now see it clearly. It has a face, or something like it. Deep empty eye sockets dominate it’s facial features. And it has a sick, way too wide grin plastered across it’s face.

This morning I saw it only about a good metre from me.

Please, I’m scared.

I feel another sneeze coming.